I’ve been thinking about you so much, how can I not with your constant reminder that you are near through your jabs and kicks to my insides. I wanted to take a moment to write about what is going on in my heart and mind right now.
At the beginning of this pregnancy I was so excited, and so frightened all at the same time. It was really hard to have such a mix of emotions running through me. We’d lost your sibling earlier in the year when we had a miscarriage, you are our second sweet rainbow baby. To make sure all was going well the doctor sent me for many tests to check on you and me. I was poked many times over, and left with bruises from them checking my blood, hormones, and so much more. It was worth it because each test showed that things were going exactly how it should be. I started to relax, and have a bit more faith in trusting God that you were going to be getting to stay with us, that this pregnancy would be different. We let some close family and friends know right away when we first found out that we were expecting you, we needed our support and prayer team on our side. We were overjoyed when we finally reached the end of week 12 and shared the news with everyone we know. Little girl, we’d made it to the first key moment.
You have a big sister, Evie, who is so looking forward to your arrival. Almost daily we hear about how you will be joining us when all of the pumpkins get her. Evie loves getting to hear your heartbeat on the doppler we have. She also loves to hug and cuddle the puppy stuffy we got from our 3D ultrasound we had where we found out if you were a boy or a girl. Your sister said from early on that you would be a girl, and she was right. We are so excited to be welcoming another little girl into our family. Daddy is doomed because he is going to have two little girls now who will have him wrapped around their little fingers. Now I warn you, your big sister likes to help. You’ll likely find her bringing you clean diapers, toys, blankets and so much more. She will realize that it will take some time for you to get big enough to be able to interact more with her, but she is really looking forward to getting to cuddle you. She is going to be an incredible big sister she already loves you so much.
Mommy has moments where she is still very nervous, and anxious for you. I’m so thankful that we are at the point where I can feel your strong kicks, and movements. It’s a constant reminder that you are there. You did give us a fright while we were at camp because I did not feel you move for some time, I tried every trick but you did not move. Thankfully you did eventually get back to your wild ways. When I went for my doctors check up after camp, I found out that you’d had a major growth spurt. The doctor said that babies often slow down around a growth spurt.
We are praying for you daily. That you are growing big (well, not too big please), strong, and healthy. We are hoping and praying that you won’t have reflux like your sister did, but if you do we are well prepared with dozens of burp cloths. We are praying that you will not have a lip or tongue tie, and that you will be able to nurse. I’d love to get to have that opportunity to 100% nurse a baby, but if bottles are needed and supplementing that is okay too. We are praying that you are not a loud crier, and that you are a calm, easy going little one. We’re praying that you will be in the perfect position for delivery when the time comes. So many random little things we are praying about for you, it might seem odd but God tells us to pray about everything, so we are.
We cannot wait for you to get here, and to get to hold you and see your sweet little face. We cannot wait to see who you grow up to become. What will your personality be like? Will you look like mommy or daddy? Will you be a redhead, bald for a long time, or what? Blue or green eyes? So many things we will get to discover very soon. The count down is on as there are only three more months to go. We are really hoping you decided to arrive early in October… we cannot wait for your arrival.
Baby girl, we love you so much.
– hugs and kisses –
Mommy
For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
– Psalm 139:13-14
Lindsey Smallwood says
Oh man, this is so beautiful Tammy. Thanks for sharing these sweet slice of your life with us.
Melissa says
This is so touching! So sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I loved the excitement my daughter had about becoming a big sister. Can’t wait to see pictures of your new little one.
Kristin says
What a beautiful letter to your sweet girl! I love it. I remember all of these feelings being pregnant with my baby girl. It is such a anxious and exciting time. I will keep you in my prayers and have faith that everything is going to be perfect.
Shann Eva says
This is such a beautiful letter, and will be such an amazing keepsake for your new baby. I wish you a healthy remainder of your pregnancy, and a healthy, easy delivery.
Brooke says
I love when I read these kinds of things. Makes my heart happy.
Jennifer Corter says
What a beautiful post! And congratulations on your little one! 🙂
Courtney Wolf says
This is SO incredibly sweet! Your little girls are lucky to have such a caring and thoughtful mom!