Pregnancy and delivery come with their own sets of concerns, and things you worry about. I had huge concerns for what came next after all of that. Having been through postpartum depression the first time, it is on my radar this time round.
The Baby Blues hit hard yesterday. I honestly felt like I got hit by a truck it overwhelmed me so much. I am absolutely thrilled that Addie is here, and so in love with her, but the sadness still came. I found myself sad about how I have not been able to do Evie’s bedtime routine with her and I feel like I am missing out on precious moments with her. I was sad that it feels like Addie has already changed, and grown so much. I was sad because I couldn’t find the swaddle blanket for her, which resulted in my sitting in the closet going through laundry and crying. I’m sad that I cannot just nurse my daughter, instead I have to pump, and supplement. Hello hormonal roller coaster, I’d love to get off this ride very quickly. So if you have a moment I have some prayer requests for you…
Please pray for my family and I. That this moment in time will end just as quickly as it started. That it will NOT turn into postpartum depression this time. We are off to the doctor this morning for Addie’s checkup, and I will be mentioning how I’m feeling already. Pray for my husband and daughters, that they continue to know how much I love them, and how thankful I am for them. That we all get through this bump in the road together. While it may seem random, please also pray for my milk supply. I would really like to be able to either exclusively pump, or nurse. I am hoping to get a hold of a lactation consultant to talk to and get help from. I was praying for an easier experience this time round, during my whole pregnancy. So far it has been challenging again.
I know we will get through all of this. I am so incredibly thankful for those that surround me and my family, and support us.
Cindy Leclerc says
This must really frustrating and scary for you. Glad you have surrounded yourself with support. You WILL get better. You have the benefit of all the knowledge you gleaned the first time round. (Remember the post you wrote for us? http://cindyandjana.com/postpartum-depression-recovery-tamaras-story/)
Wishing you rest and peace.